Qu’ai-je Fait?

Mon dieu! What have I done? What have I done?? Today I met among the greatest detectives ever conceived in mind or matter, and in my arrogance I dismissed him – insinuated that he was either making a joke or that he was insane! Clearly angered he told me to see what was right before my face with my pince-nez glasses and I did not but stiffen my lip and act smug as he walked away! And I continued – continued my attitude of conceit as I finished both our meals when they were sent to the table!

But how, you ask, if I was so dismissive, have I come to this conclusion when it was too late? I tell you that as I returned I wished to read some documents sent to me by Monsieur Trudeau before packing my luggage and – as I hoped – to return to Brussels. Promptly to read them I reached over to my mantelpiece and grabbed my pince-nez. And that was when it struck me. My pince-nez? I never brought it to the restaurant! And Sherlock Holmes, this man I angered, said in passing, as if it was obvious, that not only did I wear spectacles, but that I wore pince-nez, even though I never brought a pair for him to see! It even occurred to me that he knew I neglected to bring them that day! But how? How could he know such a thing? In a frenzy I rushed to a mirror and, though it was subtle and only visible to the trained eyes, to me it was clear as day what the man saw: two small wire pinch marks that donned the bridge of my nose!

I was struck; using only this observation and, perhaps, the observation that I lacked the chain where I usually carried it, he knew that I wore spectacles, that these were pince-nez, and that I had not brought them. Most strikingly, however, he felt little keenness to gloat about this observation, as if he tried with great strain to discover it; to him, it was obvious, worth but a critical comment in passing. Such a thing could only be observed and discovered by one man, a man who I was so convinced could not exist in this world that when he stood before me and told me who he was I refused to believe him. He was who he said he was; the famous detective Sherlock Holmes!

But Holmes is fictional! He is as these fictional characters which rumor indicated were breaking through the fourth wall. And yet he came into this world by a similar method as I? If Sherlock Holmes is fictional, then as he told me, I must see what is right before my face and, indeed as he said, with my pince-nez.

I must be fictional as well!

To those of you who tried with desperation to tell me and let me know what was going on to these fictional characters, and to myself, I commend your persistence. And if any of you had given up, and resolved to flatter my own pride, I do not condemn you; I was terribly stubborn. But it is better now that I see; it is better that I now that I accept the existential consequences of being fictional, understand that I myself cannot understand it, and resolve that I should understand it in the future.

But what of Holmes? I need to let him know and reconcile with him before his face! In haste I contacted my benefactor and asked him if he would allow me to go to New York. He hesitated, as to do so would mean he would cancel some of his arrangements. Ultimately he agreed to arrange the travel, but indicated that I had to organize accommodations. I will see what I can find with some money provided for me by the young Monsieur Paul de Blois (or Monsieur de Cavaignac, if you prefer) and arranged by Monsieur Trudeau.

America allez!

Hercule Poirot

P.S. If you have a new case, perhaps you can send me a message from my new business website at littlegreycells.biz! Graciously set up by this benefactor, I also have a contact email that will allow you to get in touch with me for a case or if I so request your formal assistance.

P.P.S. On a sadder yet inevitable note, I was informed that the body of Mademoiselle de Blois was found washed up down bank in the Seine. Her body indicated signs of great struggle, and prompted a full investigation into Elise de Cavaignac. This investigation proved very quickly that Elise de Cavaignac was in frequent contact with Mademoiselle de Blois at the time of the murder, with a request for a meeting shortly before her death. From what I hear, Elise de Cavaignac will negotiate a plea bargain for murder. I look forward to justice finally being served.

6 Responses to “Qu’ai-je Fait?”

  1. Flitterbie Says:

    Well, I suppose that it is better that you realize it now rather than never. I wish you luck in your reconciliation.

  2. Sicon112 Says:

    This post from you is a great relief. Obviously, the meeting went off in a manner that was less than ideal for all parties involved, but in the end, if things are resolved, then that is all I can really ask for. By all means, head to New York and apologize to Holmes. I wish you the best of luck.

    As to the other subject of your message, your existence, I do not believe you should be worried. After all, do you not come to your conclusions by a complex train of though like that of any other man? Think back to all the important decisions that you have made, and ask why you made them. Can you provide an answer to that question? At the moment you solve a case, you act on a long, logical chain of deduction that you can trace back to all of the evidence you hold. Is this not proof that you have as much freedom as any other man? Until such a time as you find yourself making a decision against your own desires without any reason, you should operate as you always have, assuming that your mind is your own.

    I am not bothered by your previous dismissal of those of my compatriots who brought up our mission to you; I can understand why you took the actions you did. I am merely happy that now I can be clear with you and no longer have to hide things.

    We are indeed attempting to stop a mass collapse of the ‘fourth wall’ that which separates this world from all that it considers fiction. You and Holmes are two among many characters who have crossed the wall, and we have been observing you since we appeared int he comments a week ago. Our goal is to control the damage dealt to our world by those people who have come here with less than friendly intent, and that caused accidentally by the others, while devising a way to return you to the places where you belong. So far, we have not made much progress on the second part of that goal, but I shall keep you up to date on any breakthrough’s that we have.

    Otherwise, I shall inform you of any information regarding the other people under our observation should you require it. There are multiple Persons Of Interest on my side of the Atlantic, so you may run into some once you arrive.

    I do not have any solid leads on targets present in New York City, but I have video evidence of a POI that we suspect is Cinderella arriving there, though that was some time ago. Should I receive updated information on POIs in your area, I will forward it at once. It would be a great help to us if you would relay any information that you think pertains to one, should you collect any.

    I do believe that that is all, for the moment. I shall speak with you again soon.


    • Sicon112 Says:

      P.S. It occurred to me to leave the video I mentioned above with you, in case you wish to watch it. (The footage in question is at the end)

      Allow me to be clear, I am not asking that you search for her for us. New York, being enormous, and our lack of evidence means that there is almost no chance of you finding her on purpose. However, in the event of a lucky coincidence I would prefer that you are well informed.

  3. Scarab Says:

    Its such a relief to see you have come to this realisation, though we can all fully understand your reasons for not doing so before. It must have seemed so rediculous as indeed it did to us at first. But the more the truth was shoved in front of OUR noses, the harder it became to deny: the walls between worlds are breaking down. There have been many people such as yourself entering our world, some of good intent, others… less so.

    But then, how does the old saying go, sir? I think, therefore I am?

    Good luck in your endeavours! I hope the two of you can patch things up.

  4. TheWildWestPyro Says:

    Dear Monsieur Poirot:

    I am sorry about the shock- we’re really sorry that we didn’t really tell you.

    You are fictional- I’m sorry. You’re a fictional detective that came from a series of books written by an author named Agatha Christie.

    But you are famous, and remembered, and you were very popular. As well as that, the books starring you are huge bestsellers.

    I hope that you will be able to find a job soon.

    The Wild West Pyro

    PS: God bless you, Monsieur Poirot.

  5. Adell Says:

    There are others like you, Poirot. Holmes is just one of many, we know of at least 8 or 9 more fictional individuals who have some how entered our reality! And they happen to be famous characters, just like you. Romeo and Juliet from Shakespeare’s work, for example, have appeared and started using blogs themselves.

    But don’t worry, we’ll help in anyway way we can to get you guys back to your original world.

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